7 Ways To Make Sure Your Coach Works For You
5. Be prepared to focus your thoughts on yourself
Thinking back to what one client of mine said about the right focus (it was as though my job was to make him think about him, whilst back at work everyone else’s job was to make him think about them – his boss, his team, his customers etc); the job of the coach is to focus the conversation back on the client and keep all the other people (and issues they bring) where they belong i.e. as simply the context within which the client has to perform at their best.
This is really important so please keep this in mind when you talk with your coach. It is so easy to start by talking about the situation you find yourself in right now; maybe your colleagues are being difficult, or maybe your boss or customers are not playing ball or maybe the economy is causing you problems.
Starting in this way is fine as you both need to explore and understand the details of the circumstances in which you need to perform. However, if you notice that you are well into the conversation and your coach has not moved the focus back to YOU then something is wrong. The conversation is in danger of staying on a consultancy level, where you’ll be waiting for a solution to an external situation to be suggested at some point.
At this stage your coach will probably be asking something such as “given all that, how do you need to be thinking, feeling and behaving to achieve your goal under these conditions?” In other words, the focus should now revert to you in order for you to have the opportunity to consider how to perform/respond to your situation.
Sometimes clients who are not used to making their coach work for them are surprised to have to constantly reflect on themselves and wonder what they are paying for if the coach isn’t going to give them any answers! Sometimes people are simply uncomfortable with self-reflection; if so this could be just what they need!
